I've been doing a lot of art journalling recently - I've found that it has helped me to process some difficult emotions that at the time were too extreme to talk or even think about. I generally draw like this when I'm in a very animated state, either feeling extremely bad (feeling unable to speak, read, with very strong urges to hurt myself) or at the other end of the spectrum, feeling very excitable and sped up, talking too fast (I don't really know how to explain that). In both cases I think it helps me manage the emotions without causing damage. It gives me the same emotional release I got from self harm, is the best way to describe it. At the time I don't understand what I'm drawing or why, but when I look back at it later on it is interesting to see how what I've drawn is incredibly related to the struggles I'm going through and the particular thoughts I'm having which were previously too hard to think about.
Here are some recent pages from my journals :)
I am so proud of you for using such creative expression.
ReplyDeleteYour images are yours, they reflect an inner state for you, and in that they are an expression.
You might not fully understand them as yet, but they are there and they are allowing expression.
As for the girl situation, I wish I knew the answer.
I do feel you need to know where you stand and for that to be consistent, at least for now.
Keep drawing and sketching AND random, some of that stuff looks like the Parisian street art I photographed :)))